Clean Cup, Move Down: How To Throw A Tea Party

I have talked previously about tea parties (of the tea, not tax, variety) and how fantastic they can be. A simple, friendly, delicious gathering that can be tailored for any season or occasion, it is a wonder that it hasn't become a huge trend yet.

In wondering this, I realized that perhaps people may want to throw tea parties, but think it is too large or too difficult a task, or simply have no idea how to approach it. Ergo, Rae's How-To-Party-Like-You're-Alice guide!



Tell Us A Story: Theme
If you're going to have a theme, decide on it right away, because everything else will be based upon it. Do you want it Wonderland-themed? Christmas-themed? Is it for a bridal shower or a birthday? Do you have a special desire for a Japanese tea, or something to celebrate spring? Everything you choose will be based on your theme--should you choose one. You don't have to; you can throw one as easily without a theme or rhyme or reason, and everyone will still have a lovely time.

The Best Butter: Eatables
What does one eat at a tea party? That is entirely up to you, but in general you want to keep a balance of things sweet and things savory, and all of them should be edible without utensils. Tea sandwiches, scones, tarts, and cookies are good options, though you can expand on that as you like. Homemade foods are the best, and recipes are available in myriad books and all over the Internet. If you have a theme, this is where you may begin to follow it, choosing cinnamon cookies for Christmas, pastel flower-shaped cookies for Spring, Victorian scones and tarts for a traditional high tea, and so forth. If you wish, you can end the party with Victorian-style ice cream sundaes, preferably in elegant dishes. If you prefer something less elegant, you may do that. You must only know the rules before you can break them. I do suggest putting a menu out, something with fancy script, so you don't get a lot of "What is this sandwich? What's in that cookie?" and so your table looks that much more high-class.

Take Some More Tea: Drinkables
The matter of tea is less obvious that you might think, and allows much room for creativity. Traditionally, you will have one or two pots of the same tea available, kept warm by a tea cozy. However, you may also allow each person to choose her own teabag, using the teapots for hot water. A good hostess should pour the water for each of her guests, at least for the first teabags. Presentation of a set of teabags is terribly important, and they may be fanned out in a shallow bowl or basket, or kept neatly in a tea box. If your party is during summer and perhaps outdoors, you may wish to avoid traditional hot tea altogether in favor of iced tea. This may make the entire affair much more casual, but it will surely be as enjoyable. Again, if you have a theme, consider it as you choose the tea: green tea for Japanese, Twining's Christmas flavor for the holiday season, and so on. Finally, as with the eatables, if you have many teas available I suggest having a fancy-script menu available for perusal.

Tea-Tray In The Sky: Teaware, Tablecloths, and Accessories
If you can match your teaware to your theme, do so. Use a tablecloth, preferably an elegant one, to protect your table, to hide ugly tables, and to force multiple tables to match if you are inviting many people. You will need at least one teapot, for tea or for hot water. You will want a sugar bowl (with sugar cubes, as sugar packets are rather too tacky) if any of your guests will want sweeter tea. A creamer will do to hold cream or milk. You will also want teacups (or glasses, though only if you're doing iced tea), and saucers. The saucers are necessary in case of spillage, and many guests place used teabags on them. The also look most lovely. You will want attractive plates or tiered trays to hold your edibles, and small- to medium-sized plates for the guests. Since you will likely need jam and butter for scones or other eatables, you will also need jam-knives and butter-knives, and perhaps a small plate or bowl to hold the butter. Many jam jars are attractive as-is, though you may wish to tie a ribbon around them. I don't suggest removing the jam from the jar, because it will make putting away the excess more difficult than necessary. For any necessary thing that you don't have, ask friends if you can borrow them (although I suggest only asking people that you intend to invite, or your mother).

There's Plenty of Room: Whom To Invite and How
The number of people you invite must be no more than the number of people you can comfortably sit. I suggest inviting females whom you think would enjoy tea, and preferably those who would get along reasonably with each other. Mailed invitations are ideal, but if this proves too difficult, a Facebook event invitation is entirely possible in our modern world. I do suggest making it a private, hidden event, for if someone sees the event who was not invited, she may be offended. In your invitation, be sure to specify the day, date, time, place, directions to the place, a way to RSVP, and some instruction for what to wear. My last party was merely a tea-themed tea party, and I only said to dress with tea in mind. One girl didn't own a dress and would not wear hair-bows, so I said, "Pirates drink tea, right? Dress as a pirate." Clothing specifications may be casual to formal and anything (truly, anything) in between. Lastly, if you have a theme, show it in the invitations.

Always Tea Time: When and Where To Hold It
If you can hold it at your home, that is ideal. Indoors is best for comfort, though if you choose to do it outdoors, make sure you have an indoor backup plan in case of rain. I must insist that you avoid outdoor tea parties when it is bitterly cold or ridiculously hot outside. Tea parties are best held in the mid-afternoon, though like all other tea rules, this may be broken according to your need. Just be sensible.

Very Curious: What To Do Afterwards
Wish your guests farewell, and then clean up the party. Gather borrowed items, clean them if necessary, and return them to their rightful owners. Post your photos on Facebook (you did take photos, didn't you?), tag your friends, and send me the public link in a comment...I want to see how this all turns out!

Calvin Crickball: Awesome Summer Game

Calvin Crickball (a.k.a. CCB)

On Sunday afternoon, I hung out with two of my friends, who wanted to do something cheap. I suggested stickball. They seemed somewhat reluctant, but we gave it a go, and now all of us think it's just about the awesomest thing ever. Of course, we had to modify the rules a bit since there were only three of us. Calvin Crickball is the result.

Name Origin:
+We made up the rules as we went along, like Calvinball.
+We hit a ball with a broom handle, like stickball.
+We ran to one base and back, which is apparently like cricket.

You Need:
+A tennis ball
+A broom handle or similarly-sized stick
+Chalk and/or objects for marking bases
+A decent amount of space outdoors, far enough away from windows
+At least three people

Rules for Three People:
+Create a home base, either with chalk or some object, and a pitcher's "mound" (standing place) some distance away.
+Create a base some distance behind the pitcher's place, with chalk or some object. We used a tree. The more visible it is, the better for all involved.
+One person will take the stick and stand at home base. This person is the sticker.
+One person will stand or crouch behind home base. This person is the catcher, and will catch or chase missed balls to return to the pitcher.
+One person will stand at the pitcher's place. This person is (obviously) the pitcher.
+You will want to determine a sticking rotation; that is, the order in which the three of you will stick. For instance, I sticked first, then Cameron, then Jerrica, and then we started with me again.
+The pitcher will throw the tennis ball to the sticker. Strike and ball count rules are the same as baseball: 3 strikes, 4 balls. The general "strike area" is also the same. If you hit the sticker, it counts as a ball. If you hit them very hard, it is still a ball, but they may also hit you with the stick later.
+The sticker will attempt to hit the tennis ball with the stick. If s/he hits a foul (basically the same as baseball), it counts as a strike (unless it would be the third strike, in which case it counts as nothing). If s/he hits the ball, s/he runs to the base, touches it, and then runs back to home.
+Once the sticker has hit the ball, the pitcher's aim is to obtain the ball and either get it to home base or touch the sticker with the ball. If either of these things occurs, the sticker is out.
+The pitcher and the catcher then switch places, so that both people have pitched to the sticker. Once both people have pitched to the sticker, the next person in the determined rotation sticks, and the other two people pitch and catch.
+The game ends when you get tired, or somebody gets angry and refuses to play.

Rules for More People:
+Same as for three people, except you can add fieldsmen and, if space allows, more bases to run.
+You may also want to find a different way to deal with pitching rotation, or maybe even create real teams.

Enjoy!

Items Versus Experiences

I am an accumulator. I am a person who accumulates many things. Books, wearables, craft supplies, and toys (seriously - more dolls, stuffed animals, and figurines than is sane) all find their way into my possession on an absurdly frequent basis.

Well, not anymore they don't. I decided to put my foot down. I have a list of things I want to do in my life, you see, and most of the things on the list are purely experience - and rather expensive. Visit Sweden? Go shopping in London? Pet tigers at the Wat Pha Luang Ta Bua? I realized I can't keep spending money on stuff, things that will take up space and make it harder to afford to travel. Therefore, I adopted a New Point of View: stop buying stuff that is not necessary. "Necessary" means a pair of sneakers when I have none, not a pair of strappy black shoes because my other fancy shoes don't quite match the dress I want to wear. This way, I could save my money to spend on experiences, or to spend when I catch lunch with a friend, or to save for the future. Much better uses of my money, and my time and sanity (my brain blows a fuse every time I have to allocate space for more books or shoes).

Last weekend I went to a rummage sale, thinking I might find some unique charms to reuse in jewelry for my Etsy. Since I was armed with my New Point of View, I was sure I would buy nothing extraneous.

I came home with two Lord of the Rings books, four Anne McCaffrey books, and fifteen Isaac Asimov books.

It's a process.

On Optimism

I am, for the most part, an optimist. I have heard many people say that the danger of being an optimist is that we must get disappointed all the time, for having such high hopes. That is a bit of a misconception. True optimists don't have the chance to be disappointed. Rather, when hopes are dashed, the true optimist moves immediately to the next hope, thinking perhaps something good will come from the situation as it stands, that something even better will come along, or that something else entirely will occur that will also be good. It takes quite a lot to leave an optimist in disappointment, because we almost always have hope for the events of the future.

For these reasons, if you converse with me thinking I should be disappointed with something, you'll hear a lot of "at least X is still true" or "but maybe X will happen" as I seek out the bright side and the possibilities. In some ways, I'm not sure I believe in inevitable failure--a thing I share in common with Captain Kirk (consider the Kobayashi Maru).

Unlike many optimists, however, I have my optimistic side peacefully coexisting with my bitterly jaded side, which is another issue entirely and involves a lot of, "well, I saw that coming."

-----

On an unrelated note: I officially have an Etsy that is open for business, so check it out!

-----

Things My Mother Has Taught Me

Since Mother's Day is tomorrow, I'm doing a sort of Mother's Day special on advice from my mom. Most of it has been gleaned indirectly, from seeing how she does what she does.

(Edit 20.Jun.2010: The companion Father's Day blog can be found here.)

Some things my mother has taught me:

• +Unplug your toaster after using it, or the next lightning storm will destroy it for sure.
• +Use coupons, discount cards, and mad haggling skills to get things cheaper. Also, take advantage of rummage sales, thrift stores, garage sales, and friends who are getting rid of stuff.
• +Take vacations.
• +Make sure your tires aren't flat before you get in your car.
• +Archie comics are the best comics.
  
• +If something isn't perfect (including purchased items and food at restaurants), complain until they fix it or make it up to you. After all, you paid for it.
• +It is perfectly okay to collect toys when you aren't a kid anymore.
• +McDonald's is good. Burger King is evil.
• +On hot days, don't go outside between 11 AM and 3 PM. Between 3 and 6ish is fine, but after that the mosquitoes come out and you have to go back inside.
  
• +Cats are completely worth the trouble it takes to own them.
• +Be nice to your mother, or your life will be much harder than it needs to be.
  
• +Always check under your car for gators and rapists.

If you have any motherly advice of your own to add, share it in a comment!

Good Programming Practice

Henceforth, I intend to post an entry every Wednesday and Saturday. I expect you folks to hold me to it, should I forget or ignore this self-imposed obligation.

Without further ado, here is this entry!

I am by no means a professional programmer. I recently finished Computer Science I at my university, and I struggled through it. In my struggles, though, I learned two major things that help with good program design, and I would like to pass them on to other student programmers. I'm all for learning things on your own, but sometimes it's better to learn from other people's mistakes.

Quick note: my CS1 class used C, but these thoughts should be useful for any programming language that uses functions (or methods), including some scripting languages.

Thing Number 1: Block Diagrams

Block diagrams: use them. Before you start coding your project, look at what you have to do, come up with a design, and draw boxes and diamonds and arrows, with simple words and conditionals, visually representing what it is you intend to do. Basically, imagine a flow chart that does what your program will do. You'll figure out very quickly if the vague idea you thought would work actually makes sense, and it'll help you figure out where you are being inefficient (i.e. did you draw the same box in two places, and can you make that not happen?). When it comes time to actually code, you can follow your block diagram for what to code next and what connects to where. It'll also make it easier for you to figure out some of the functions you will need, which brings me to...

Thing Number 2: Functions

Functions: Use them, liberally. I used to be in the habit of making my main() entirely too long, stuffing as much code as possible into it, and not understanding why functions were really useful except in certain special circumstances. The way I coded made my work more difficult, as I tried to read my code and keep track of what I had done, and it made debugging far more ridiculous than it should have been. Now, whenever I have a chunk of code that does one definable thing, I make it into a function. Determine input (if necessary), test the output (or what was printed/changed if it is void). It makes testing/debugging easier, because you can test each function essentially independently of the rest of the program. When everything is in main(), it tends to get so wrapped up in the rest of what you've written that testing a particular section of code involves a lot of commenting things out, and is a pain in the ASCII. Functions also just make things more organized. "Gee, where's the chunk of code that handles checking out a customer?" Why, it's the the checkout() function that I wrote. "I need to initialize a few structs." It's only a few lines of code, but it's much neater to keep it all in an init() function.

Give it a whirl, little programmy folks, and if you have anything to add, clarify, or argue against, please feel free to comment!

A Personal Taste of Wonderland

It is a brick building, an old building, five stories high and full of rooms and mysteries that I will never know. It is a world of its own, full of tea-drinkers and puzzle-solvers, men in collared shirts who feel quietly important, offices and rooms for learning that have chalkboards, not whiteboards, with real chalk and erasers.

The first floor is more like a basement, in terms of access to the outside, and houses the locked door to a Foucault pendulum, which is suspended from the ceiling and has been inactive for years.

The second floor is the main floor. One major entrance leads to the landing between the first and second floors, and the other, on the opposite side of the building, leads straight to the second floor. On the second, third, and fourth floors, between the two flights of stairs heading towards and away from each floor, there is a row of chairs. That row on the second floor is especially good for sitting. It is prime for watching people, the people who belong to that place and the people who don't, and it has a view of that second main entrance, the ramp that goes straight to the second floor. There is a brick arch over that ramp, which connects to brick ceiling and brick walls and the rest of the brick building, and sitting in that row on the second floor allows a perfect view of the slanted natural light on the large alcove beyond the arch. You see, when walking into the building, from that ramp, the main doors are to the left of the arch. When sitting in that row of chairs inside the building, the main doors are directly in front of you, placing the arch beyond the doors and to the right, sunlight slanting in like something magical, something unreal. Especially, it is something beyond what one expects to see in this city.

The first through fourth floors all have normal purposes, but the fifth floor is small, tiny, in fact, and holds only a door to the roof, a door to a room of excess furniture, and a door to the place of the building's inner workings. The floor itself is merely a partial room with a brick floor, good for thinking alone. It is the one place that I can find true solitude in the middle of the day.

There is more to this place than just the physical building. To breathe its air, to learn of its world, to meet its true inhabitants, is to begin to fall under its spell. I have breathed this air, had tea with the puzzle-solvers and believed I too belonged there. But I have not visited it for days now, and in breathing the air that is fresh, I begin to wonder--is that the world in which I belong?

They did welcome me. Oh, how they welcomed me. It would take work, to join them, but it was perfectly possible, even for one so young and ignorant as I. And others congratulated my choice--to have a woman among them would be marvelous, and unexpected. I received smiles, I received guidance, I was handed a perfect plan for solving the puzzles with them, for the rest of my days if I chose. I need give up no other dream, merely the time and money it would take to gain the necessary skills. And then, I could live in their world for real.

But I have not visited for days now. Maybe weeks. I have been thinking. As fresh oxygen reaches my lungs, instead of their stardust, their chalk dust, I have begun to wonder if that world is where I belong.

What I want to do is to do as I am doing now, at this very moment, as I am putting these letters in this order. I want to write. "How vain it is," spoke Thoreau, whom I seldom believe but for this, "to sit down to write, when you have not stood up to live." I want to live in all worlds, to experience all good things, and to breathe the beauty of every good place. This world of brick and puzzles and magic, which I have grown to love, will never be thoroughly known to me, for I have other worlds to taste, and other beauty to see.

This building is the Math and Physics building at my university. It means nothing to so many students; it has been Narnia and the Wardrobe itself to me. I briefly thought I should do this for my life, that I should get a Ph.D. in mathematics, that I should be one of these professors, living in my office every day, solving puzzles for the world and teaching students how to solve puzzles of their own. It sounded beautiful, it sounded perfect. The epiphany hit me as I sat within that building, breathing in its spell. As I rule, I don't trust epiphanies, but I chose to trust this one anyway.

But I have not visited it for days now, and I can breathe air again. So back to my original plan I go. I would like to be a writer. I want to solve puzzles in my free time, of mathematics or cryptography, but if I never have the time for such things, I want writing and exploring to be the main takers of my time.

I don't much care whether you disagree with me. I have missed breathing proper air.